Driving on the Palmetto – aka State Road 826, aka gateway to Hialeah, aka Hell on Earth – is a uniquely Miami experience. There’s nothing like it, and for that we should all be grateful.
Because driving on the Palmetto is the worst. Worse than I-95 and its people clinging to moving vehicles. Worse than 836 and its endless construction.
There are many reasons the Palmetto is so awful. Part of the problem is Miami drivers, who are terrible even by post-apocalyptic “Mad Max Fury Road” standards. It’s never a lovely day on the Palmetto.
The other problem? Trucks.
There are trucks everywhere on the Palmetto. Sometimes they drive too fast. Sometimes they drive too slow. A lot of the time, they hog all the lanes at once. Furious, you just crawl along behind them, spitting out every objectionable word you know in every language you have mastered.
We know we need trucks to deliver important things, like liquid nitrogen and other dangerous elements. That’s what those old “Terminator” movies say, anyway. But sometimes, we really wonder about the cargo. Is it necessary? Is it vital? Or is it deeply questionable?
Here are just a few of the trucks you don’t want to get behind on the Palmetto – and what they carry.
Pallets. Nine times out of 10, it’s pallets
Giant spools of…something
The world’s biggest hose
Trucks on top of a truck on top of a truck on top of a…
Whatever this dangerous item is
This thing also
Potential toxic disaster