Give Dwyane Biscayne? Yes! But let’s name these things after the Heat superstar, too

Let's name everything in Miami after Dwyane Wade. It'll certainly make Miami Dade College's parking sticker hotter than the University of Miami's.

In this time of political turmoil, there’s one cause that can bring all of Miami together.

And that’s the “Give Dwyane Biscayne” movement.

This brilliant campaign, masterminded by sports radio host and obvious genius Brendan Tobin, urges the City of Miami to rename Biscayne Boulevard after beloved Miami Heat superstar Dwyane Wade, who has long been Miami’s MVP.

Read more: D Wade and Udonis Haslem open a pizza joint – and it’s not your typical celebrity spot

Tobin, who cohosts a show on 790 the Ticket with Leroy Hoard and Brian London, released this video on his Instagram. We don’t know about you, but we caught a few tears. Almost as many tears as we caught when Wade returned to the Heat from the Chicago Bulls.

We can’t like this idea enough. But why stop there? Let’s name ALL the Miami things after Dwyane Wade, who’s playing what is almost certainly his final NBA season for the Heat. Or at least a few more things. Such as:

The entire county

We already think of it as Miami Wade County. Let’s make it official.

Golden Glades interchange

We’ll let Don Shula keep his expressway and Dan Marino keep his boulevard. But from now on the gateway to Miami is the Golden Wades. Somehow makes those constant slowdowns and that utterly insane exit from the Palmetto easier to bear.

Colleges

You can get a degree at Miami Wade College in agility, leadership and being 100 percent clutch.

Wynwood

Even the hipsters would be less annoying in Wadewood. Plus there would be a basketball hoop for every mural.

The Everglades

That’s it. It’s official. Now and forever, they will be known as the Everwades. Nobody would dare pollute the Everwades. And you know those big scary reptiles that lurk within the River of Grass? They are now alli-waders. Deal with it.

Comments