JCVD (R) ***½

Oh Van Damme, the man can act!

By Rafer Guzman, Newsday

If you didn't think he had it in him, check out Jean-Claude Van Damme's acting -- that's right, acting -- in JCVD, an offbeat, fun and funny movie in which The Muscles goes back to Brussels and earns a whole new sort of celebrity.

Van Damme bravely plays himself, an aging action-star whose B-list status has fallen so far down the alphabet that he's losing roles to Steven Seagal. After a failed custody battle over his daughter, Van Damme takes refuge in his Belgian hometown only to stumble into a hostage crisis at the local bank. His cinematic moves are no match for real bullets, and to make matters worse, the police commissioner (Francois Damiens) and the gawking public believe he's the culprit, not the victim.

Written by Frédéric Bénudis, Christophe Turpin and director Mabrouk El Mechri, JCVD is more than a pop-cultural in-joke. It's also a gritty police procedural that recalls the '70s-era classic Dog Day Afternoon. El Mechri ambitiously moves back and forth in time and juxtaposes wry comedy against some brutal violence, much of it chillingly dispensed by French actor Zinedine Soualem as the robbers' ringleader.

In one remarkably surreal scene, Van Damme faces the camera and reflects on his life in an agonized, tear-streaked monologue that's almost worth the price of admission. Seagal, it's your turn.

Cast: Jean-Claude Van Damme, Zinedine Soualem, Francois Damiens

Director: Mabrouk El Mechri

Screenwriters: Frédéric Bénudis, Christophe Turpin, Mabrouk El Mechri

Producers: Sidonie Dumas

Running time: 96 minutes. Language and some violence. Playing in Miami-Dade only: Cosford.

Jean-Claude Van Damme.