The Jersey Shore - Season 2, Episode 12
Mike is a bad wing man, Sammi is a bad girlfriend and JWoww's fashion sense is just bad.
The gang is still at Tantra, reeling over the smack Mike just laid on Snooki's thin lips. They are herded into the taxis and deposited back at the Metropole, Vinnie bringing his squeeze Ramona (he's finally getting some regular action).
As Snooki is complaining to Ryder about how much she hates Mike's guts, he crawls into bed and apologizes, giving her lots of hugs and kisses. She says she forgives him, but her contempt is evident. Ryder has to leave the Metropole, causing Snooki to ruin her smoky eyes with a torrent of tears. "I go crazy in this house, living with nutjobs." Never fear, your time in Miami is almost over. It appears that the kids are developing a case of Miami ennui.
Finally, the gang is able to get into another club besides Klutch, Tantra and B.E.D.! The crew is excited to go to Club Space and party all night. The visit is cut short when a girl from a neighboring table starts talking smack to Snooki. The whole crew is upset. Ronnie - "It's 3:15! I just got here!"
Pauly D (for some reason) keeps bringing home girls who are DTF (down to - you know). Unfortunately for Mike, their friends are not. So Mike spoils two seperate chances for Pauly D to smush because he refuses to "babysit grenades" while his friend gets busy. Pauly wishes that he would "take one for the team." He's a horrible wing man.
Ronnie and Sammi have a fight. Don't ask what it was about. Ronnie doesn't know and we no longer care.
Snooki loves Vinnie: "He's like my big brother, I love him, but you usually don't have sex with your big brother."
Metrosexual: Mike and Pauly D get thier eyebrows waxed! Guidos seem to have a lot in common with Puerto Rican men.
J -WOW: Jennie's outfit to Space consisted of tiny mesh skirt and a tiny mesh shirt with some pasties covering her nips. Oh, and a pair of black sneakers.
You said it, Snooki: About JWoww's outfit - "She looks like the ultimate stripper and that's why I love her."
Uh oh: The Sitution - "Don't come over somebody's house at 5 a.m. and expect to play checkers." We are sure that's what Kobe thought, too.
SoFla firefighters: "One's tall and tan and looks Italian. I would have smooshed that. It's one of my fantasies." - Snooki. This is why the women of Miami put on make up before calling 911, Snooks.
Familia: Pauly D reflects on the sense of family that the crew has, "We all know each others faults, we know which buttons to push, we know what Snooks cuka looks like."
Hook up board: Jennie and Snooki draw a family tree that demonstrates they everyone in the house has shared spit with everyone else by association. "Somehow everyone's hooked up in this house." - Jenni.
From where?: The Situation: "We spot two blonds, and they were from Canadia."
Nice touch: Pauly and Situation spray cologne on their privates before crawling into bed with the Canadians.
The Jersey Shore was here:
On Our Radar
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- Jose Fernandez may get his own Miami street
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- Leonardo DiCaprio, Mark Ruffalo at “Before the Flood” screening
- What's closed in Miami because of Hurricane Matthew
- La La Anthony in Miami trying out cocktails