Things we’d rather be doing than working the day after the Super Bowl

Eagles Coach Doug Pederson is all smiles, but frankly we're exhausted.

By now, you know all the important stuff: who won the Super Bowl (not the New England Patriots), which commercial was the best (the “Dirty Dancing” bit with Eli and OBJ), how much damage overenthusiastic Eagles fans did to Philly once the game was over.

And now it’s back to work. Ugh.

Wait. I mean “great!” Just in case my boss is reading this.

But listen, after one of the best Super Bowls in recent memory, a sports hangover is inevitable. You’re tired because you stayed up too late, and the game was so good when you finally got into bed you were too wound up to sleep.

Yesterday you ate too much. You put a lot of energy into trying to forget how long it has been since the Miami Dolphins were in the Super Bowl.  (It was 1985. Seriously. 1985. Insert crying Jordan meme here.)

Here are a few of the things we’d rather be doing than working.

Looking at Super Bowl memes

There are just so many variations on this theme. Want to see insults hurled at Tom Brady? No problem. Or perhaps you prefer team-wide insults that target New England or Philadelphia.

A post shared by NFL MEMES (@nflmemes_ig) on

There’s also the Selfie Kid from the halftime show. In fact, the halftime show produced almost as many memes as the game itself. There were a lot of angry Prince fans who are mad Justin Timberlake used a video of the Purple One in his act, either as a well-intentioned tribute or a gross, selfish misappropriation of an icon. You be the judge.

Read more: The best Super Bowl halftime show memes

Rewatching the video of Prince’s halftime show in Miami

It was a rainy night in Miami, and he sang “Purple Rain” in the rain and played a phallic guitar. Who cares who played in the game? Nothing compares 2 him.

Checking out the new “Cloverfield” movie on Netflix

Man, I don’t care how cool these monsters are, no way were we staying up even later to watch them.

Yeah, we were shocked that Netflix basically announced during the game that the movie would be streaming after the game. But how could we watch it!? It was already 10:30 p.m. and we had to go sob over “This Is Us.” Plus, you know, go to bed. Eventually.

Reliving every moment of “This Is Us”

Seriously, why do we watch this show if all it does is make us weep?

We have to rehash it because we can’t get over [redacted here]. Being attacked by the “Cloverfield” movie would have been less agonizing.

Eating leftover chicken wings instead of that healthy salad we brought for lunch

Watching the Super Bowl is a license to eat these till you feel queasy.

Seemed like a good idea to eat something nutritious after a day of greasy chicken wings, artery-clogging dips and vast quantities of beer. But somehow that spinach and kale masterwork you brought to the office just doesn’t look enticing.

Eating a Wawa sub in honor of the Eagles victory

Sure, we prefer Publix subs, but this is a special day.

Yes, usually we roll our eyes at Wawa, but we feel the need to do something to thank Philly for defeating the forces of evil. Also, did we mention we aren’t ready to go back to healthy eating just yet?

Complaining about the fact the Miami Dolphins traded Jay Ajayi to Philadelphia

I’m sure that fourth round pick the Fins get for him will work out just fine. As fine as Jay Cutler worked out. Oh God. Pass me another chicken wing to drown my sorrows.

We are salty about this, but trust me, Jay is not.

Comments