Everybody thinks their city is the best. Even Cleveland and Tallahassee probably think they’re pretty great. (Miami editor’s note: They are not.)
But Miami really is the best. Even when it isn’t. And frequently it isn’t. Trust us on that.
Still, there are things that make Miami special, things that keep us here despite all the reasons we have to hate it.
No state taxes
No state tax? No problem.
Our natural disasters are predictable
None of this nonsense of sirens going off mere moments before a tsunami or a tornado bears down on us. No earth opening up to swallow our highways. Just weeks of stress and waiting until the last minute to buy supplies.
Our people watching is the best
It’s particularly good on Halloween. But this guy is out walking around most days, we’d bet.
The Miami Heat
Yeah, we lost our Big 3, and we’re still salty about D Wade leaving. But we’ve got Pat Riley, Erik Spoelstra and a scrappy team with awesome new Miami Vice unis. And so we remain #305TilWeDie.
We actually do have culture, but you can ignore it if you want
You can see opera, ballet, theater or modern dance at our lovely Adrienne Arsht Center in downtown Miami. You can see world class art at the Perez Art Museum or see the best authors on the planet at the Miami Book Fair in November. Or you can ignore it all and stay home, drink beer and watch sports on TV, and nobody will judge you.
Someday we’re all going to have waterfront property
A little more climate change, a few more King Tides and boom! Your house in Kendall is waterfront property.