“Going back to normal” is a deceptive phrase when you’re talking about Miami. Our normal is your “what the hell is wrong with these people?”
But less than a week after Hurricane Irma scared the hell out of us and took away our power, our foliage and – briefly – our ability to fight about politics, there are signs that Miami is returning to its usual self.
1. You can buy gasoline without engaging in a nihilistic battle to the death
Not every station is open yet, but the “Mad Max” dystopian combat for gas has ended. The lines that wrapped around the block are gone, and you can miraculously use that magical debit card again, if you haven’t forgotten your pin number.
2. That guy with all the mattresses tied to his roof is back on the 826
Oh yeah. He’s back. So is the driver going 30 mph in the express lane. The days of blissful, non-existent traffic have been replaced by the usual Death Race 2000 scenarios.
3. You can order a Publix chicken tender sub
Even though the shelves are still a little bare, you can still order this mouth-watering bite of heaven. Order two!
4. The trees that were all over our yards are now piled up at the side of the road
At least we can drive to work. Wait. Is that a good thing?
5. Water is back to being a simple, easily obtained commodity
Most of us can even drink it out of the tap now, not that we ever will.