Florida is teetering on the brink. OK, to be fair, Florida is teetering on many brinks on any given day. But the latest concern is the looming possibility that our state will adopt Daylight Saving Time year round.
The deal isn’t done yet. But the Senate voted 33-2 Tuesday to send a bill to Gov. Rick Scott asking Congress to decide if we can take a pass on this whole spring forward, fall back thing. The House passed the measure 103-11 on Feb. 14.
We spring forward March 11. We may not fall back.
There are some of you who are quite smug about this, crowing excitedly about the fact that in the winter, there will be more sunshine, as if somehow we have a lack of that in Florida. We have a few issues with the whole idea.
Here are some reasons Miami doesn’t need Daylight Saving Time all year.
We don’t need more daylight after work
Stop acting like you do anything after work but eat a nutritionally imbalanced evening meal and watch Netflix. You’re not out kayaking or running or going to the beach. You don’t need more sunshine for sitting on your couch.
Rep. Heather Fitzenhagen suggested Floridians would revel in the ability to go out to dinner with a spouse under perpetual Daylight Saving Time, as if nobody can ingest food after the sun goes down. Are you kidding me? Miami thrives after dark. The only place you go when it’s still daylight is the early bird buffet.
Some mornings, it’s still going to be dark at 8 a.m.
You think it’s hard to get your kids up for school now? Wait till the sun comes up after 8 a.m. You’re going to need a crowbar to get them out of bed.
New Year’s Eve will be all messed up
The time-honored tradition of watching the ball drop in Times Square? Done. It’s over. The ball will drop at 1 a.m. Florida time, A FULL HOUR after we have celebrated the arrival of the New Year. Pitbull is going to have to work VERY hard for that extra hour each January.
We are never going to know when Dolphins games start
The NFL schedule is rigid. Early games start at 1 p.m.. Except in November and December, they’ll start at 2 p.m. in Miami so they can be shown at the proper time. For the late games, you’ll be home an hour later, Dolphins fans. Don’t even think about how late you’ll get home after a night game. On the bright side, the chaos will be over in December because we don’t have to worry about playoffs.
Forget all west coast sports
We can’t even do the math to figure out how late west coast Miami Heat games will end. All we know is it will be long after we’re asleep.
TV awards shows will start an hour later
The Oscars already end at midnight EST. Now they’ll end at 1 a.m. Florida Standard Time. We won’t know what to complain about until the following morning.
When will our favorite TV shows be on?
Will our HBO favorites start at 9 p.m. Miami time or 9 p.m. EST, which is 10 p.m. Miami time? My brain hurts. I can’t think about this anymore.
What happens to Miami Time?
The ramifications for Miami Time are uncertain. We’re known for our lateness. We can barely get to a party at the right time. Would this change signal the end of Miami Time? Somehow, we doubt it.