Our most important life lessons come from so many different and interesting sources. On Thursday, they arrived courtesy of a viral video from someone who claims to be a Miami driver. (Maybe he is; maybe he isn’t. The way people drive in Miami, it’s entirely plausible.)
In any case, the alleged Florida Man in the car was trying to document the grueling misery of “Miami’s daily traffic.” And it is agony, we know.
And as he shoots the video on his phone … well. He appears to drive into the back of another car.
MY FRIENDS DAD WAS TAKING A VIDEO OF THE TRAFFIC AND UM… pic.twitter.com/dXVX1oTJj5
— samantha • 12 days (@wdwemilio) March 22, 2018
He – or someone – also says something when he hits the car and drops the phone that I am not at liberty to translate.
Whether this video is real or not, it is emblematic of the actions of many Miami drivers, who surely need a few tips on how to take photos and/or shoot video while driving.
Rule no. 1: Don’t. You never know when someone is going to jump out and start beating your car with a sledgehammer. But we know nobody is going to put down their phones. Even when they should.
Look, we know we shouldn’t take photos on the road. Ever. But sometimes you see something so weird – like, say, a giant rocket booster heading south on the Palmetto – and you just have to record it for posterity.
But it’s really not a good idea to do this. Ever. It’s a skill best left to professionals – or at least someone who happens to have a passenger in the car. But if you absolutely must do it, here are our best tips for not driving into the back of stationary vehicles:
Don’t record and drive
Always a bad idea.
Record only when the car isn’t moving
Still a bad idea.
Stop driving and recording at the same time
Stop it! We told you it was a bad idea.
Even if this guy is ahead of you: